Everything is in a mess. Why the bloody things are going wrong. I feel so helpless. I want to do something, but I feel my both hands are tied and somebody is trying to strangle me. I am trying to move, but just can't. I am suffocating. Feel like someone is stabbing in my heart and I am struggling to breath. Everything in my stomach is going for a spin and I feel like throwing up. Feel like grabbing whatever I can and throwing it away. I want to go to the beach, face the ocean and scream at top of my lungs. May be someone will be able to hear me.

It is upto me to write the rest of my story. They have been writing it for me. Now it has to be my turn. This is my fucking life. Why should anyone else have a say in it. Even if I want to screw it, its my personal choice. Is it really too difficult to understand??

I feel I am getting sick. I am just afraid of the day when I will succumb to the pressure and lose everything I ever had. This all just sucks. I need a change. I want to run away, from everything, from myself. I want to be alone. Lost and confused, I don't know who I am anymore.

Fuck this world. Fuck everything.